


Waking (and Dreaming)

by Dalankar



Category: EXO (Band), SHINee, Super Junior
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-04
Updated: 2015-05-04
Packaged: 2018-03-29 00:04:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3874978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dalankar/pseuds/Dalankar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He's about to get his legs broken by Changmin's minions when he first meets Sehun. The boy appears a out of nowhere,  a rage of fists and kicks and saves Hyukjae's life like he was always meant to.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Waking (and Dreaming)

He doesn't know how a nice kid like Sehun ever got mixed up with Snake's gang. Doesn't know what had made him think that being a minion to a deadly psychopath was a good idea. Hyukjae watches him gobble down ramen at record speed and wonders if he ever gets fed. He pushes all the side dishes towards Sehun who smiles at him with a mouthful of dinner.

"When did you last eat?"

Sehun shrugs, shoving a huge piece of kimchi into his mouth. "Food is expensive, hyung."

Hyukjae would laugh. Except its true. Food has become ridiculously expensive since the drought had started ten years ago. So many people are starving now. At least being a top agent with the government's secret service keeps him fed well enough.

"What are you doing with him, Sehun? "

Sehun darts a glance at him and looks back down at the bowl of half finished noodle. "Something to do, hyung. Not much a guy like me can do out there now."

"It's trouble, you know that."

Sehun smiles, eyes crinkling into halfmoons "Are you going to turn me in, hyung?"

He should. The government's been super focused on cleaning up the streets from gangs, as if that would keep people fed. But they want to look like they're doing something useful.

"It might get you killed."

Sehun shrugs. "Gotta die sometime, hyung. "

This time Hyukjae does laugh and he reaches out to ruffle the boy's dark blonde hair. "You're too young to talk like that, Sehun-ah."

He lets him stay the night, piles blankets on him as he curls up on the couch. "So soft, hyung," Sehun says wonderingly, running careful fingers over the quilts.

Hyukjae's heart breaks a little.

"Go to sleep, punk," he says, trying keep his voice casual.

Sehun looks at him for a moment, then breaks into a grin.

"Thank you, hyung."

 

He's about to get his legs broken by Changmin's minions when he first meets Sehun. The boy appears a out of nowhere, a rage of fists and kicks and saves Hyukjae's life like he was always meant to.

Hyukjae wipes a bloody hand over a bloody face and looks up at his saviour. Sehun grins, fiercely and joyously, dark hair flying around his face and making him look like a beautiful avenging angel.

"Best not to wander around here after dark, mister," he says.

Hyukjae holds back a laugh, mostly because right then it would hurt to laugh. But he's been investigating gang activity in the area. Not that he had meant to get set upon by a bunch of thugs.

And by the snake tattoo he sees curling around his rescuer's right wrist that marks him as one of Snake's men, Hyukjae appears to have fallen from the pan right into the deceptively innocent looking fire.

The boy holds out a hand. "I'm Sehun," he says, pulling Hyukjae up to his feet.

"Hyukjae. "

He's not sure why gave his real name. Fairly few people alive who know his real name, but somehow this boy who'd known him for less than 5 minutes already knows what most people wouldn't find out in a year.

Hyukjae pretends to stretch his abused muscles as the kid stares at him for a long moment.

"You're cute," is the next thing the kid says and Hyukjae nearly chokes on his tongue.

"What?"

Sehun shrugs and moves closer. "I can come home with you if you want," he suggests in a low voice.

Hyukjae looks him over. Thin. Thin like regular meals are one thing Snake doesn't guarantee his followers.

"How old are you?" he asks, mostly out of curiosity and not at all because he is considering the offer.

Another shrug. "Old enough for whatever you have in mind."

Hyukjae suppresses a laugh and decides he likes Sehun, regardless of his agent training.

Hyukjae had taken him home, and after Sehun helped him clean up, cooked him a meal that had made Sehun promise him free sex for a week. Hyukjae had refused. Of course. But he'd extracted a promise for Sehun to come over for a meal whenever he could, he'd promised him sanctuary from real life. He'd never asked what kind of things he does for Snake, against all his instincts. Just this once, Hyukjae wants to save someone without regret.

 

Sehun is loitering outside his apartment when Hyukjae gets home from work one day. He'd been in a shitty mood because Key had dumped all the paper work on him since he apparently had a date. Hyukjae really doesn't see what that has to do with turning in their paperwork, and had said so. Key had only smiled sadly at him and asked him when the last time was that he got laid. Hyukjae had choked and spluttered, and Key had laughed and sauntered off. Long story short, Hyukjae is home late by two hours. Sehun doesn't see him first and Hyukjae stops for a moment and watches him. He is leaning back against the door, long line of his body still so skinny despite all of Hyukjae's attempts to feed him. Seeing Sehun, Hyukjae feels his grumpy mood disappear.

Hyukjae walks up to him and Sehun straightens up.

"Thought you weren't coming home tonight, hyung," Sehun says, a smile already on his face.

"I wished you'd tell me when you're coming around, " Hyukjae complains, unlocking the door and letting them in. Sehun crowds in to him, arm around his shoulders, and staying close.

"I don' t know when I have to work, hyung. I come over whenever I can," Sehun tells him sincerely. Hyukjae looks at him carefully.

"You're alright? "

Sehun grins brightly. "I'm with you, hyung. I'm definitely alright."

Hyukjae laughs and pushes him away playfully. "You're so fucking cheesy."

Sehun eats all the food Hyukjae cooks for him and sleeps on the couch. When Hyukjae wakes up, he is gone but there is a warm cup of coffee on the table with a note.

_Made coffee for the first time, hyung. I don't know if you want to drink it._

Hyukjae grins, his day brighter already, and takes a sip.

Too much sugar. And nothing much else. He drinks it all.  

 

Hyukjae is just out of the shower when he hears the insistent knocking at the door. He wraps a towel around his hips and goes to answer it. He's fairly annoyed at the weirdly rhythmic knocking that comes and goes and if it's some idiot playing stupid tricks, he's going to bring the full force of the law down on them. Although he is sure that he can't arrest people for knocking on doors. Even if it is incredibly irritating.

He opens the door with more force than necessary, mouth already open to yell - Sehun grins at him sheepishly from the other side. Then looks him up and down appreciatively for a long moment.

"My offer still stands, hyung," Sehun says, voice lower than normal.

Hyukjae swallows, stepping back and leaving the door open as an invitation. He hears the door shut as Sehun comes in and hears the lock click in place. Hyukjae is about to head for the kitchen to start boiling some ramen, when Sehun wraps his arms around him from behind.

"You smell nice, hyung," he whispers, fitting the long line of his body along Hyukjae's.

"Sehun-ah-" Hyukjae starts. Sehun hasn't tried to proposition him for a while.

Soft lips touch his bare shoulder. "I'd really like you to fuck me, hyung."

Hyukjae feels a jolt in his bones at the words.

Warm calloused hands stroke their way down his body towards where the towel is wrapped haphazardly around him. Hyukjae catches Sehun's hands just as the long fingers reach the top of the towel.

"Sehun, you don't owe me this. You know that. "

Sehun stays quiet for a moment. "I know, hyung. I know you're the only person who'd never ask me for that. That's why I want it. I want to have sex with someone I like this once. "

Hyukjae turns in the circle of Sehun's arms to look up him. He hasn't seen Sehun in a week and now that he looks closer, there is a bruise, fading already across one high cheekbone. He reaches up, grazes a hand over the mark.

Sehun huffs out a small laugh. "I'd like to know, hyung, that not all men are like that."

Hyukjae presses his lips over the bruise. As Sehun's eyes flutter shut, Hyukjae kisses the tip of his nose, the strong jaw and the soft lips.

Hyukjae gives in.

 

He leaves Sehun asleep wrapped up in blankets on the bed to cook breakfast. He'd woken up in a tangle of Sehun's long limbs, his snake-tattooed hand curled possessively over Hyukjae's chest. He doesn't want to get used to this, he thinks, breaking eggs over the pan, because he knows that he can. For an agent to get into a relationship with a gang member-

\- relationship?

"You're thinking too much, hyung," Sehun walks in, wrapped up in a blanket, hair a mess on his head and smiling. He looks happy, and ridiculously beautiful. "Those lines are going to stick, you know."

Hyukjae laughs and Sehun grins.

"It's nice, hyung, when you laugh like that. "

Hyukjae walks over, and kisses him. Sehun hums happily and kisses him back.

"Are you making me breakfast, hyung?" Sehun murmurs against his lips when Hyukjae leans back.

Hyukjae ruffles his hair. "Brat."

 

He doesn't see Sehun for two months. By the end of it, he'd already searched all the hospitals and inquired from all his sources. No extreme gang activities were reported and no dead bodies turned up. Hyukjae is a bundle of nerves when he comes home on a Friday night, to find Sehun asleep waiting for him on the top of the steps by his front door. Relief floods him immediately, and he lets it bring him to his knees beside the boy. He looks tired. But there are no bruises on his face and nothing looks broken. He sighs, settling himself down beside Sehun.

Sehun slowly opens his eyes, gaze searching over Hyukjae's face, then smiles.

"Did you miss me, hyung?"

Hyukjae laughs. "Absolutely not."

Sehun grins. "Liar," he says and leans closer. "But I missed you, hyung. "

Hyukjae's heart twists at the sincerity in Sehun's voice.

"Where were you?" he asks later as Sehun gulps down rice like he hasn't eaten in the two whole months that he was away.

Sehun doesn't look up. "Work, hyung. "

Hyukjae grits his teeth and says nothing about how worried he'd been. How scared that Sehun was dead somewhere and he would never know.

"Two fucking months?" he snaps, more emotion than he'd intended sneaking into his voice.

This time Sehun looks up. And sets the spoon that is half way up to his mouth, back down into his bowl.

"Hyung-" he gets to his feet and walks over to him. Hyukjae sits still, trying to keep his breathing even as if he hadn't just admitted how much he'd missed him.

"Hyung, I'm sorry. I didn't have the time to tell you. He sent me away suddenly," Sehun explains softly, carefully.

Hyukjae shrugs. Sehun wraps his arms around Hyukjae's shoulders. "Don't be angry at me, hyung. Please."

Hyukjae sighs, and tries to pull away. Sehun holds on. "You're the only one that loves me, hyung. If you hate me, I'll have no one."

"How do you know that I love you?" he asks indignantly, a smile already at the corner of his lips.

He feels Sehun's smile. Feels it like the sun light. "You do, hyung. Otherwise you wouldn't worry so much about me."

Hyukjae huffs.

"It's okay I worry a lot about you too."

 

”How come you never turned me in, hyung?" Sehun asks one day, lying down on the couch with his head pillowed on Hyukjae's lap. He'd turned up late again, his bottom lip split and a purple bruise blossoming around the left eye. Hyukjae had stared at him for a moment, waiting at his doorstep.

He hadn't smiled. Hadn't made a joke. Just met Hyukjae's gaze with tired eyes, shoulders already slumping.

"I'm glad you're home, hyung."

Hyukjae doesn't ask questions. Partly because Sehun probably wouldn't answer them. But mostly because if he knows the answers, then he'd have to do something about it. Which means arresting Sehun, and the rest of Snake's gang. He's learning now, to look away, to choose his battles. He's learning now that Sehun might be worth it all.

So he hadn't asked, who or how or why. Just sat Sehun down on the edge of the couch and cleaned up his face.

"Because I'd be miserable without you," Hyukjae admits, glancing down to catch Sehun's reaction. Sehun's eyes widen and he scrambles up, eyes never leaving Hyukjae's face.

"Hyung-" Sehun starts but cuts himself off. Instead, he leans in, buries his face in Hyukjae's shoulder, fingers gripping in his shirt.

Hyukjae wraps his arms around him, pressing him in as close as he can because he can feel Sehun shaking.

"Thank you, hyung," Sehun murmurs into his neck.

Hyukjae presses a kiss onto his hair and holds tight.

 

"What do these stupid bastards think we are? A fucking post office?" Key growls. Hyukjae ignores him, trying to get some paperwork done while trying to ignore the terrible knot in his heart that keeps worrying about Sehun. It's only been five days, he knows that but he can admit to himself now that he has become irrevocably attached and going a day without seeing Sehun is becoming more and more difficult.

"'Sehun's in trouble,'" Key mimics in a high pitched voice. "'If you don't get him, he'll die. Under the Black Pearl.'" Key laughs. "What the fuck?"

Hyukjae is already out the door.

 

He smashes the lock off with the butt of his gun, and spills in through the door. The corridor is dark and narrow. There are no guards. Hyukjae scoffs, but thanks his lucky stars in his mind.

He finds the room without much trouble. It is the only one with a barred door. He pushes it in, and enters cautiously. And just for a moment, he freezes. His brain refusing to process what he is seeing. That there, curled up in one shadowed corner of this cold, filthy room is his Sehun. Sehun, with an old blanket covering his body, flinches when he enters. Flinches like he's expecting a blow and curls up tighter. Hyukjae runs, dropping to his knees besides Sehun.

"Sehun," he calls softly, hands hovering hesitantly over Sehun. A shiver runs through Sehun's body, and he makes a sound, breath hitching like a sob. "Sehun, open your eyes. It's me."

Hyukjae picks up Sehun's tattooed wrist, finds his pulse slow and lethargic. He rubs his thumb over the bony wrist. "Come home with me, I'll make you ramen," he promises.

Sehun's fingers grip his hand. "Hyung..." he says in a soft, gravelly voice and Hyukjae leans closer to hear. "Hyung, I'm having a nice dream." Sehun shifts closer and leans his head against Hyukjae's knee. "This is a nice dream."

Hyukjae blinks the tears out of his eyes. "Let's go home, Sehun. "

 

_He twists. But it only makes them tighten their grips on him._

_"Are you fucking him?" Snake asks in a soft voice watching him with his hands clasped behind his back._

_"Snake, please..."_

_"ARE YOU SELLING ME OUT?" Snake yells suddenly and Sehun flinches back. "Did you think you could go behind my back, you stupid bastard!"_

_"I wasn't. I swear. I never said anything. He doesn't want to know anything. Hyung, please."_

_Snake watches him for a moment._

_"I liked you." Then he nods at the men holding him, and they tug him away. Sehun struggles, because he knows he can fight. But they have guns and if he struggles a bit too much, he knows Snake is no longer in the mood to miss him. If he ever was._

_He hears the door creak open and tries to hunch in on himself. The floor is cold and dirty but he prefers it to whatever is coming. He hears a gasp. Then careful hands are touching his face._

_"Sehun," a familiar voice calls, "Sehun. Oh god, wake up!"_

_He knows that voice. Fingers card through his hair, pulls at the tangles and it hurts. His whole body hurts. He tries to open his eyes._

_"Sehun, please wake up. "_

_Jongin. It is Jongin's voice. He opens his eyes._

_Jongin laughs in relief. " Thank god!"_

_Sehun clutches at Jongin, who lifts him up to cradle him in his lap._

_"Tell me who he is. I'll get him to come for you," Jongin whispers. Sehun curls into him._

_He misses Hyukjae hyung 's voice. His laugh. His warm hands._

_I'm sorry, hyung._

_"Sehun, tell me. Snake will kill you."_

_Sehun feels tears pickling at his eyes and squeezes them shut._

_I'm glad I met you, hyung._

_He feels Jongin's arms shaking around him. "Sehun, you know I can't get you out. Tell me how to save you." Warm hands fold him closer. "Please, tell me."_

_Just keep me warm, Sehun wants to say. He hates being cold._

_Just stay with me until I'm gone, Jongin._

 

He wakes up suddenly. He doesn't need to remember to know what the nightmare was about. He doesn't stretch because he knows it would hurt. Instead he pulls the soft quilts around him and buries himself in them. He peers over them when he hears footsteps. Hyukjae hyung walks into the room with a tray full of food and he emerges from his cocoon even further. Hyung smiles and Sehun heart does that weird thing it does whenever hyung smiles. He knows he will never get used to this. Never get used to someone caring for him like this.

"Rise and shine, love," hyung says and Sehun doesn't even try to fight off the blush at the words. Hyung sets the tray down on the bedside table and sits down at the side of the bed. Sehun migrates closer immediately, putting his head over hyung ' s thigh. Hyukjae hyung runs his fingers through his hair and He closes his eyes with a happy sigh. And for a moment they just stay like that. Sehun thinks it must have been the best thing he's ever done, to come into the rescue of the random guy getting beat up by Changmin ' s thugs.

"Hyung," he says, opening his eyes and looking up at Hyukjae hyung. "When did you know?"

Hyukjae hyung ' s fingers gently massage over his scalp. "When did I know what, Sehun? "

"That you'd love me like this?"

Hyung ' s fingers still and his eyes widen in surprise.

"You know when I knew I loved you, hyung? " he asks, without waiting for an answer.

"When did you know?" hyung asks in a voice too low to be casual.

Sehun sits up, cradles hyung 's face in both hands. "That first night you let me stay over-" he caresses his thumbs over hyung's cheeks, "-the blankets you gave me were the only ones you had."

Hyung opens his mouth as if he wants to protest but Sehun leans in, kisses him softly on the lips. "Before I left that morning, I looked into your room. You were asleep with your jacket on. You only just met me and you did that." He bites his lip to keep the tears at bay. Hyung looks like he's not doing any better. "No one has ever done something like that for me."

Hyung pulls him up, gently so that his wounds don't pull, up on to his lap. "How could I not love you?" he asks softly, and kisses him, hands warm and steady on his back.

"I love you, Sehun -ah," hyung tells him, pulling back a bare inch.

Sehun smiles. No one has ever, in his entire life, ever told him that. And he's never, never going to let this slip away.

I'll never let you go, hyung. I'm yours today, tomorrow and forever.

 

***


End file.
